Annika turns 3; Liam turns 1 month

 Annika had her 3rd birthday party on the 20th July, together with Liam's one month baby shower.
She asked for an Angelina Ballerina cake so this is what Chris and I made!

Liam turned one month on the 21st July, so timing was perfect for the 2 of them to have a joint celebration.

We had the party at the function room by the pool and catered for the party. Instead of the usual tried and tested caterers we decided to try out a new one that belonged to a friend of a friend.

Not a good idea.

The food was not bad, but there was too much dessert and not enough mains. The amount of food provided was insufficient and I felt it didn't justify the cost.

We invited family and close friends ( mostly neighbours! ) for the party. I also got a balloonist and a face painter to come in to entertain the kids, and that was a hit. Worth every penny.

The only person who didn't have a swell time was the baby! He was fussy the entire time! I don't know if we even managed to get a picture of him not screaming! I guess the timing wasn't the best, since he's the grumpiest in the evenings.

In other news... I didn't even realize till someone told me: Liam shares Prince William's birthday, and Annika has the same birthday as the new royal baby!

3 weeks

Liam officially crossed the 3 week mark on Friday last week.

In another few days he will be one month old!

We're celebrating his one month and Annika's 3rd birthday together on the 20th July. Nothing complicated, just a small party for a few friends and family at the function room downstairs.

It's been challenging, doing the newborn thing again after having a full night's  sleep for the past 2 years or so.

But I think knowing that this will probably be our last makes it easier. Bittersweet, really.

Liam is the smallest of the 3 ( even though I put on the most weight of the 3!!) I really wonder what determines the size of the baby!

Fortunately he eats fairly well, and hasn't really been too difficult. ( Maybe it's too early to tell! ) For most of the day he seems quite content to nurse and then sleep. I started a bottle a day really early this time--within the first week. Not making the same mistake again! Both Madison and Annika were bottle refusers.

For the past 3 weeks he spends most of the day sleeping and when he's up he's a tad grouchy. I started taking him out initially, but after the scare where I thought he was febrile I'm more careful now. I still find it difficult spending the entire day at home so I caved in after a few days and started going out again. 

He's physically getting stronger now, and his jaundice seems to be settling.

Starting this week I've also noticed he's more alert, and is able to stay awake for longer periods once in the morning and once more later in the evening. He's still really grouchy at 6-7 pm and is slightly difficult to settle for bed. Quite similar to Madison!


Today I had a revelation. I feel rather bad towards Annika. I'm really afraid she'll get the middle child syndrome. One of the things I realized is that with Madison and Liam I got/get to spend alot of one-on-one time with the baby. Madison because she was an only and first child then, and Liam because the older 2 are at school and at their cousin's place during the day. With Annika I had to divide my time between her and Madison. With Liam, the older 2 already have each other for company so it's a little easier to spend solo time with him.

Unfortunately it's not something I can undo, but I hope that she will get a different type of benefit from having many siblings/cousins to play with. I will try and pay more attention and show her more love ( and patience ). Must remember! She's actually quite a sensitive and thoughtful little girl.

Parenting is really a challenging task. I don't think it gets easier with time, just different. The biggest difficulty is really having enough time to do everything and spend enough time with each child.

I really wish someone could tell me exactly what to do and that what we're doing now will actually make a difference in their lives!

Welcome Liam James Chui

Liam James Chui arrived on the 21st June 2013 at 2229h.

He weighed 3035g and was 51cm long.

I was quite surprised by his arrival really..   I truly expected him to go past his due date, partly because his last estimated fetal weight at 38 weeks wasn't very high.

So I was determined to continue with life as normal at 39 weeks.

We had a potluck dinner organised for the evening with a few friends( neighbours  ) and we were having a steamboat dinner. I was supposed to prepare the chicken broth and buy some fresh produce for dinner.

I think contractions started on the night of 20th, because I had a restless night and hardly slept. I noticed irregular but starting-to-hurt type contractions... but in my mind I assumed they were just stronger Braxton Hicks because I just turned 39weeks.

By morning the pain was getting more obvious, but not so much that I couldn't function. So I went about my usual day, although I let the girls start their school holiday early because for some reason I just couldn't bring myself to take them to school.

At work the pain was still irregular but I was really cranky. Man... people that turn up to ask for medical leave! Here I am in occasional pain and STILL at work!!

It was a good thing that at the back of my mind I felt I really had to cancel the next day's appointments. So I did.

I called it quits at work around 5pm and went home to rest. I think close to 6pm the pains intensified and I knew there was no way these could just be BH contractions.

Chris got home early ( thank goodness ) so we waited a little while until the contractions were 5 minutes apart. By then we decided to head to KKH to get checked out. I was still contemplating whether or not to get an epidural.

At the labour ward it took forever to get registered and then I still had to be hooked up to monitors for over half an hour while they monitored the contractions. That was quite uncomfortable. I have to thank my good friend KSY whom I was messaging, regarding epidurals. She said "yes! "

Still it took a good hour before I finally got the epidural, and then it was pure bliss. By some stroke of fate, the anaesthetist who turned up happened to be the very same guy that gave me the spinal at Annika's emergency C section! Except he's now promoted to be consultant! I was just wondering how strange it was that the 2 anaesthetists would be named Shawn at both my births. This time the spinal-epidural worked beautifully and it took most of the pain away.

I was 4 cm dilated at admission, and after the epidural we were able to lie back, relax and watch Sherlock Holmes on TV. Dr John Tee arrived to see me just past 9pm and he was really surprised that I was already 9 cm dilated.

He left me and returned at 10 pm and told me the head was right there! It was incredible. I didn't even realize I'd been having regular and strong contractions. Thank goodness for the epidural. He hitched my legs up, told me to give strong and steady pushes, and in 3 pushes Liam was born.

I admit, I was a little disappointed that he was a pint sized 3 kg at birth, considering his 2 sisters were 3.2 and 3.5kg respectively. Still, the most important thing was that he was well and I had a successful VBAC!

Dr Tee didn't do an episotomy but I had a minor tear. He stitched me up quickly and did the blood taking for cord blood storage. The placenta weighed 660g.

KKH has this new skin-to skin contact thing, so I was left with naked Liam for over an hour. I think this birth experience was so much better than Madison's, I felt less rushed, more relaxed and they gave me more time after delivery to recover in the labour ward than before.

It's now 1 week since Liam was born, so today is technically his due date. He's got the same issues as his sisters, mostly jaundice requiring regular heel pricks and visits to KKH. He gave me a huge scare yesterday.. when he woke up at 5pm he felt really warm to me and I measured his temperature to be 37.8 C. I panicked big time thinking neonatal pyrexia. I kept taking his temperature throughout the evening and night and fortunately that settled.

It's such a relief to have delivered the baby. The last month of pregnancy was so uncomfortable, from the chronic distension of the abdomen, inability to eat proper meals, occasional reflux, and most annoying of all, this strange insomnia. I hardly slept the last month! When the baby popped out, it was IMMEDIATE relief. I could breathe again!

I'm really happy to meet this youngest member of the family, and for some strange reason, this kid I fell in love with immediately. I think its the confidence that comes with subsequent children... less apprehension and more knowing that 'this too, shall pass!'

Week 37

Last week was a good week in my books.

The kids were well. They went to school. They were happy.

As this is the school holiday season, there are holiday programmes aplenty. I happened to chance upon a 2 day workshop that claimed they could teach multiplication by drawing. I was intrigued. After consulting with my parents, I signed Madison up for the workshop. As my dad said.. if it's crap, just don't go for the 2nd day!

I was lucky too, to have a good friend that also signed her daughter up for the same workshop, so Madison had company.

Turned out they were right! The method is ingenious! Day one they did single digits, and by day 2 they did double digits. I don't think Madison is ready for double digits but she did get the concept for single digits! I was impressed.

We had a potluck planned for Friday night, and I planned on making lamb shanks. We met up with M Han for dinner Thursday night, and he helped me pick out my fabulous Le Crueset dutch oven. It was heavenly to use the heavy cast iron pot! I am sold on using these cookware. The shanks turned out perfectly after 4 hours in the oven. We were scraping the bottom of the pot by the end of dinner.

The weekend was nice and low key.. Saturday started off as usual, tennis for Madison at 8am, work for me. It was really nice that Chris had the weekend off so he spent the morning with the kids. When I was done with the clinic we took Madison out for lunch and decided to get her eyesight checked.

Turned out her sight was fine but mine was not so hot. The optometrist told me my corneas were apparently becoming hypoxic from prolonged use of contact lenses, and that I had to lay off them for the next 3 days. In addition I had to restrict the duration of use subsequently. This was profoundly annoying. I hate the poor vision that I get with glasses and the weight of the glasses on my face. But.. I asked for a professional opinion so I guess I'd better comply.

On Sunday Warni had her day off so it was just the 4 of us for most of the day. Again, it turned out surprisingly peaceful. Madison had her golf lesson in the morning and we took Annika to the range to hit some balls with her club. This time we borrowed a shorter golf club from the school and she loved it.. I was suckered into getting her a tailor made club. With a Hello Kitty grip and pink flowers on the graphite shaft!

When Madison was done with her lesson we drove over to Vivocity for lunch at Bakerzin. I had a good time actually! The kids were well behaved, ate their lunch and we were able to sit down and complete the meal peacefully.

In the evening Madison had her tennis class at the Swimming club so we were headed that direction again. Chris and I took Annika for a swim while we were waiting for Madison. Chris left our stuff on an empty chair while he went to change, and this plump lady approached me to say that she had 'reserved' the seat already. I didn't say a word, but looked around for another empty chair which I promptly fetched for her to sit on. I hope she felt embarrassed that she had to ask a pregnant woman to get her a seat! After which I left and went for my swim.

We had dinner at the club, then drove over to the hospital for Chris to see his patients. I took the kids to 7-eleven for ice-cream while waiting for him. Such simple pleasures but I gratefully appreciate them now... for now...

Appreciating the GOOD days

I think I might have discovered an epiphany...

After the bad round of sickness for the past 2 months, I am starting to appreciate and enjoy the good days.

I think parenting must be like that. Good days and Bad days.

Bad days: kids are sick, parents are tired and everyone is in a bad mood. Days like that I really wonder about parenting skills, why life sucks and just how tiring everything is.  Days like that I miss the childfree times, sleeping in weekends and holidays, the freedom to stay out late, eat rubbish and do anything we want. Go on holidays at the drop of a hat, ski holidays at that.

Then we get some good days... the kids are finally well, they fight less and we feel more energetic. We still can't sleep in or go on multiple ski holidays but at least I'm not in a constant state of impatience/ annoyance/ unhappiness.

I was having trouble with Madison's apparent bouts of aggression towards her sibling/cousins.. and I think we might have found out why.

When she's at my sister's place for the afternoons, I suspect she spends a large amount of time watching videos on the iPad.

After the last round, we put an end to her iPad privileges and I am pleased to say that her behaviour has improved markedly!

She now plays more amicably and is less moody at the end of the day. I think the mindless watching of videos was probably doing more harm. I just needed my dad to enforce it, since he is quite generous with iPad privileges.

I'm holding my breath to see how long this current "good" round will last.... my next concerns will start when the baby is born.. .

Long Weekend break

We had a long weekend over this past weekend.

It had been a tough week for me because Annika had been ill for most of it. So when our neighbour friends asked us to a joint movie night on Thursday to see Fast and Fabulous 7 I jumped on it.

The movie was alright... not as good as Ironman 3 but it was a good break. Unfortunately with movies it usually means a late night out..

Friday was a public holiday due to Vesak day.
But somehow with young kids public holidays never feel like a holiday... they were still up before 7am!

Annika was still under the weather, refusing to have breakfast, being whiny etc...

Madison had a golf course lesson scheduled for 8am, so we had to have a quick breakfast and head out. We left Annika at home with Warni since she needed to rest.

We dropped Madison off to golf, then Chris went to see a few patients. I headed off to meet up with a friend. It started to pour, and the course lesson was terminated. Chris picked Madison up and we went to Takashimaya for a spot of shopping and lunch instead. It was pretty fun, actually! Madison is getting so much easier to go out with...

Saturday was a really busy day... it started with the girls tennis coach FORGETTING to turn up for the lesson(?) .. afterwhich Elizabeth had her birthday party at the kids eXplorer indoor playground.

Getting to the place was a nightmare! For one, E's party coincided with the start of the school holidays.. I think the entire population was there for the day! There was absolutely no parking ... and there were hoards of people EVERYWHERE. Turned out it was a family day fiesta, and they were offering free entry to the playground for 300 kids!

In any case, I think the kids had a real ball.. Annika missed out because she was still not quite healed.. however Chris was a real trooper and took care of her for the morning. I think they went shopping and had lunch together. We now have 4 or 5 brand new goldfish in our tank.

Saturday evening we had a potluck dinner with several neighbours... It was a feast... Japanese curry, braised tofu (me), braised pork knuckle, chap chye (stanley ) , grilled salmon, chicken wings ( Fanny), Pavlova (Sabine). And lots of wine... fine weather was a bonus too.

On Sunday morning, we took the kids to Bishan park on the spur of the moment. Madison didn't have her usual golf lesson because she had it on Friday. It was super hot. We brought the kids' roller blades and scooter along.



It just so happened we met with another bunch of neighbours at the park! They were there having roller blading lessons. Madison was having confidence issues with using the rollerblades and scooter. Chris and I are convinced it's our genes. This dislike of speed/ lack of control issues.. or maybe she just needs to do it more frequently!

In the blink of the eye.. the entire weekend was over. When this week is through, we will enter the month of June. Where did 2013 go???

Being a parent

I think I really suck at being a parent.

1. I have very little patience.

2. I don't know how to discipline my kids in a way they 'get' it

3. I can't deal with sick kids, not even my own. I can see them as patients, but not actually care for them.

When the kids are well, things are better.

The mornings are still stressful trying to get them both ready for school. I really don't understand why kids have to dawdle so much in the morning when it's exactly the same everyday. I have an hour to get them ready now. I can't even begin to imagine when they start primary school and have to be ready for school at an unearthly hour..

Of course now Annika is sick again for the month. She was so well.. and then just suddenly became sick in a blink of an eye. This morning her temperature was 39C, and she threw up after eating 2 spoonfuls of yoghurt. Thank goodness Warni was already here and she handled it. I seriously cannot do sick kids.

Last night, out of the blue, Madison kicked Annika off the sofa. Annika landed on the hard marble floor head first and smacked her forehead on the ground. It was so loud!

I was flabbergasted. And really angry.

I admit it... I smacked her hand and Chris put her in a naughty corner for a long time. We got her to apologize and make up with Annika afterward.

Then this morning.. she did it again! Kicked Annika but at least nobody fell off anything.

I was like ????? She got 3 smacks on her leg and a really stern warning. I really didn't know what else to do. We've warned her so many times. She's already been in naughty corner. What's next?

I was really glad to go to work this morning.

Days like that I seriously wonder if I should ever have had kids! I'm not good at this! It doesn't help that this sort of thing gets to me and I feel guilty/bad/sad about it afterwards. And obsess about what I should have/should do.

My sister is way more zen about parenting than I am.. and maybe I should take notes ...