I finally did my first parent volunteer job!
When Madison started school, I was so pumped and full of excitement; to be 'part' of the school spirit, to support her in her next stage of education etc etc.
And then life got in the way.
I don't know why life is just so unbelievably busy. Why does night fall come so quickly and so predictably every day?
As it is I barely have enough of me to spread amongst the 3 kids, my husband, my family, work and the house. All house related things have come to an absolute last in priority. We basically go home to sleep and that's about it. There isn't time anymore to potter around the house, or to do any homemaker type activity like bake/sew/cook.
SO.. I was so psyched to do parent volunteering, but when the crunch came, I just couldn't spare any more time. Doing any volunteering means more time off work, at a time when the clinic is finally picking up and starting to do well. I already take time off work to attend any compulsory kid related event so anything more is too much. Poor Liam wasn't allowed to go to his first Bibinogs excursion because I REALLY could not justify another morning off to accompany him to Jacob Ballas Kids Garden!
Anyway, almost half the year goes by without anything and then fortunately 2 friends with kids in primary one cajole me to join them for Recess mum duty. They both work, so they get the time commitment thing.
It was fortunate that I managed to get the same time slot as them, so today I took the morning off to do Recess Mum duty. Wasn't too bad, except that the weather was horribly hot and humid and we had to stand around policing the kids for just over an hour. I got to see Madison for all of 5 minutes before she went off with her friends. ( which is a good thing ! )
After we finished our duty we FINALLY got to sit down and have drinks! Then the BIG girls came out for recess and my goodness! I cannot imagine the day when my little girls get to THEIR size. We sat at the first table nearest the food stalls and that was a huge mistake. Within minutes we were surrounded by swarms of HUGE girls queuing up to buy food!
Since I had the rest of the day off I also made plans to meet up with my old girlfriend from SCGS who is now a dentist. She works near Great World City so we met there for a quick lunch.
It's really nice meeting up with people from the past and still connect in that special way!
Wednesday, May 13, 2015
Saturday, May 9, 2015
New friends!
I have new friends!
Never thought that after all this time I could still make new friends!
It started off with tennis lessons at the club for Madison. Her coach suggested private lessons which we did, and that led to her sharing some sessions with another boy one year younger.
I bumped into his mother several times over the year, and we both signed the kids up for the JTT mini tennis tournament at United World College earlier this year. Her son actually got champion and runner's up for both sessions!
At the second tournament she mentioned that she just started tennis sessions with another mother at the club, and asked if I would like to join them.
To be honest I was quite nervous, but I thought 'what the heck! Give it a shot and if I don't like it I can stop! '
Turns out the 2 women are really nice people! We had a session with all 3 of us, but then the weather was unfavourable for the next 2 weeks. Last week we finally had good weather, but the one who organized it got a back injury. We still continued with the lesson( just 2 of us) and we had fun.
In support of our injured buddy we will go and swim with her after the tennis session on Tuesdays. (Tuesday is tennis day for us)
I think friends motivate us. I was starting to dread tennis lessons alone and now it feels like the pressure is off. I think that was why I gave up on French lessons. The subject material was quite interesting, but not having or knowing anyone at the lessons made me lose my motivation to attend the lessons. It just seemed that at those lessons the participants seemed to change every class!
We are social animals. I think in life it is the relationships that make life worthwhile and satisfying!
Never thought that after all this time I could still make new friends!
It started off with tennis lessons at the club for Madison. Her coach suggested private lessons which we did, and that led to her sharing some sessions with another boy one year younger.
I bumped into his mother several times over the year, and we both signed the kids up for the JTT mini tennis tournament at United World College earlier this year. Her son actually got champion and runner's up for both sessions!
At the second tournament she mentioned that she just started tennis sessions with another mother at the club, and asked if I would like to join them.
To be honest I was quite nervous, but I thought 'what the heck! Give it a shot and if I don't like it I can stop! '
Turns out the 2 women are really nice people! We had a session with all 3 of us, but then the weather was unfavourable for the next 2 weeks. Last week we finally had good weather, but the one who organized it got a back injury. We still continued with the lesson( just 2 of us) and we had fun.
In support of our injured buddy we will go and swim with her after the tennis session on Tuesdays. (Tuesday is tennis day for us)
I think friends motivate us. I was starting to dread tennis lessons alone and now it feels like the pressure is off. I think that was why I gave up on French lessons. The subject material was quite interesting, but not having or knowing anyone at the lessons made me lose my motivation to attend the lessons. It just seemed that at those lessons the participants seemed to change every class!
We are social animals. I think in life it is the relationships that make life worthwhile and satisfying!
Adjusting to life in Primary one, adjusting my expectations
The year is almost half way through and time isn't slowing down!
Madison is settling down to life in primary school. We've had our hiccups and I'm also trying to find my way around the education system.
It's quite scary when you talk to other parents and their kids seem eons ahead with multiple tuition lessons. And the mothers ( usually stay at home ones ) have all their lesson plans set, with the entire year mapped out.
But I got a reality check when I realized Madison gets stressed, and she doesn't even tell us about it.
She had that one episode earlier in the year when she did that weird crying and walking around her room at midnight thing because she was stressed about being bullied in school.
After that was resolved she was fine.
Then just last week she did that crying and walking around thing again! She initially denied it when I asked her the next day, then finally admitted that she was nervous and scared about an oral presentation. ( which went fine the next day )
And at work, one of my patients came back after not seeing me for 5 years, and told me that her young sibling had passed away. It was most probably self inflicted and it is terribly sad.
So I realized: it cannot be about the grades and trying to just score marks in school. It is more important to be adjusted, to have friends and be happy. Of course it doesn't mean not even trying, but if the kids have done their work, tried their best then the mark is simply to demonstrate where they could learn more. I was speaking to a mum and she told me her husband lost one week's worth of sleep because he was upset his kid scored 95% instead of 100% because she made some silly mistakes.
I think I want my kids to understand that the mark they get from a test should be just an indication of where they could improve on, but ultimately I must also realize that even adults still make mistakes and forget stuff on tests! Given an open book test adults STILL make mistakes! How much more a kid?
It's a work in progress, and I have to remind myself of the BIG picture, of what's important in the long run!
Madison is settling down to life in primary school. We've had our hiccups and I'm also trying to find my way around the education system.
It's quite scary when you talk to other parents and their kids seem eons ahead with multiple tuition lessons. And the mothers ( usually stay at home ones ) have all their lesson plans set, with the entire year mapped out.
But I got a reality check when I realized Madison gets stressed, and she doesn't even tell us about it.
She had that one episode earlier in the year when she did that weird crying and walking around her room at midnight thing because she was stressed about being bullied in school.
After that was resolved she was fine.
Then just last week she did that crying and walking around thing again! She initially denied it when I asked her the next day, then finally admitted that she was nervous and scared about an oral presentation. ( which went fine the next day )
And at work, one of my patients came back after not seeing me for 5 years, and told me that her young sibling had passed away. It was most probably self inflicted and it is terribly sad.
So I realized: it cannot be about the grades and trying to just score marks in school. It is more important to be adjusted, to have friends and be happy. Of course it doesn't mean not even trying, but if the kids have done their work, tried their best then the mark is simply to demonstrate where they could learn more. I was speaking to a mum and she told me her husband lost one week's worth of sleep because he was upset his kid scored 95% instead of 100% because she made some silly mistakes.
I think I want my kids to understand that the mark they get from a test should be just an indication of where they could improve on, but ultimately I must also realize that even adults still make mistakes and forget stuff on tests! Given an open book test adults STILL make mistakes! How much more a kid?
It's a work in progress, and I have to remind myself of the BIG picture, of what's important in the long run!
Tuesday, April 14, 2015
Hong Kong Disneyland March 2015
When I discovered last year that Madison could no longer travel whenever we wanted, we quickly decided and booked a short getaway for her March holidays to Disneyland in Hong Kong.
Travelling with kids always makes me nervous.
First of all I worry if we will actually MAKE the trip. Would the kids fall sick just before?
Of course Liam runs a low grade temperature and pukes the day before we were supposed to fly. Fortunately he was afebrile the morning of the flight and we did get on the plane.
The flight was quite hilarious. It was his 'first' flight and he was terrified everytime they made an announcement on the PA system. And whenever the air stewardesses came he would wave them away with a 'bye bye'.
We made it to Hong Kong in about 4 hours, and checked into the HK Disneyland resort. The place was fabulous! Service was attentive, the grounds were huge and very child friendly. We had 2 rooms booked and they provided a cot for Liam. They also had kid sized bathrobes and slippers!
We spent 1.5 days at Disneyland and the kids had a really good time. The rides are small kid friendly so they could ride on almost all of them. We caught a few shows too which were very well put together. Plenty of retail therapy as well; who could resist shopping in the Disney shops?
The kids were really sad to check out of the resort, but we had planned to go visit the Science and space museum in Mongkok.
The second hotel we checked into was horrible. It was recommended by a friend who thought it was a full service apartment, but when we got there it was no where near any standard of service. I spent the night camping on the floor because we couldn't get a spare mattress. Basically there was no number that we could even call for any help!
First thing next morning I called up the Langham place hotel ( where our friends were staying ) and got us rooms. It was a 1000% upgrade. We also upgraded to 2 family rooms, so in effect we wound up with 4 rooms ( 2 sets of 2 interconnecting rooms ). There was an inhouse spa, sky pool and gym on the 41st floor of the hotel. It was in the middle of Mongkok so we were right smack next to shops and food. The kids were well looked after too-- the staff were attentive, and they had bathrobes/slippers for the kids too!
After we moved over to the Langham place hotel the rest of the stay was fabulous. We managed to go see the Science museum, watch an Omnimax show ( which I fell asleep in -- chair was pretty comfortable!) and have a few good Yum cha meals. The kids enjoyed the pool at the hotel, and I got to use the onsen in the restroom.
Too soon it was time to go home and the kids were really sad to have to leave Hong Kong. We've had some bad experiences in Hong Kong so this was a really good experience for us. I think we probably would be back to enjoy the DisneyLand resort soon in the future.
Travelling with kids always makes me nervous.
First of all I worry if we will actually MAKE the trip. Would the kids fall sick just before?
Of course Liam runs a low grade temperature and pukes the day before we were supposed to fly. Fortunately he was afebrile the morning of the flight and we did get on the plane.
The flight was quite hilarious. It was his 'first' flight and he was terrified everytime they made an announcement on the PA system. And whenever the air stewardesses came he would wave them away with a 'bye bye'.
We made it to Hong Kong in about 4 hours, and checked into the HK Disneyland resort. The place was fabulous! Service was attentive, the grounds were huge and very child friendly. We had 2 rooms booked and they provided a cot for Liam. They also had kid sized bathrobes and slippers!
We spent 1.5 days at Disneyland and the kids had a really good time. The rides are small kid friendly so they could ride on almost all of them. We caught a few shows too which were very well put together. Plenty of retail therapy as well; who could resist shopping in the Disney shops?
The kids were really sad to check out of the resort, but we had planned to go visit the Science and space museum in Mongkok.
The second hotel we checked into was horrible. It was recommended by a friend who thought it was a full service apartment, but when we got there it was no where near any standard of service. I spent the night camping on the floor because we couldn't get a spare mattress. Basically there was no number that we could even call for any help!
First thing next morning I called up the Langham place hotel ( where our friends were staying ) and got us rooms. It was a 1000% upgrade. We also upgraded to 2 family rooms, so in effect we wound up with 4 rooms ( 2 sets of 2 interconnecting rooms ). There was an inhouse spa, sky pool and gym on the 41st floor of the hotel. It was in the middle of Mongkok so we were right smack next to shops and food. The kids were well looked after too-- the staff were attentive, and they had bathrobes/slippers for the kids too!
After we moved over to the Langham place hotel the rest of the stay was fabulous. We managed to go see the Science museum, watch an Omnimax show ( which I fell asleep in -- chair was pretty comfortable!) and have a few good Yum cha meals. The kids enjoyed the pool at the hotel, and I got to use the onsen in the restroom.
Too soon it was time to go home and the kids were really sad to have to leave Hong Kong. We've had some bad experiences in Hong Kong so this was a really good experience for us. I think we probably would be back to enjoy the DisneyLand resort soon in the future.
Update post hospitalisation, NORMAL life
It really is a relief to go back to normality.
On the 6th of April I took Liam for his cardiac appointment ( this was post - hospitalization when the paediatrician picked up a cardiac murmur ).
Liam did very well! He was a seasoned 'patient': no fuss when the cardiologist listened to his heart, and he also allowed a trainee cardiologist have a listen as well. When he had to have the echocardiogram he stayed still long enough for the radiographer to scan his heart. ( I had him on me and I lay on the examination couch ).
When the radiographer was done she called the doctor in to have a check and that really scared me! We all know they only ever call the doctors in to review the scans if something is wrong! Fortunately that wasn't the case and Liam was discharged with a normal echo.
So that leaves us with one more paediatrician review in June to repeat his blood count ( he's also mildly anaemic! )
We've been laying low the past few days: I really wanted everything to go back to normal. So, tennis/swim on Tuesday, Chinese class Wednesday , music class Thursday and swim class again on Friday.
On Sunday Madison had to go for round 2 of the JTT mini tennis tournament.
It was a scorching day! She did really well, no complaining throughout the 2+ hours of tennis ! Her tennis partner Ravin got the runners' up trophy: he was short of winning by 1 point!
The only bugbear of this tournament was seriously the 'hovering' dad syndrome that 2 fathers' had.
( by the way-- their sons won the trophies partly because they did that!) Parents were given specific instructions that the point of the tournament was for the kids to learn to play competitively and learn the spirit of the game. Parents were to stay off and let the kids pick their own balls and count points. However there were at least 2 dads who found it exceedingly difficult to do so and hovered around their sons, picked balls up and basically umpired the matches for them. I didn't realize it at the point, but as the game was counted purely on the number of points the child could score in the games, they obviously scored the most points because their dads were handing them balls to hit continuously!
After the game we drove to Marina Bay golf course to meet up with Annika and we had lunch together. Chris left for his golf game ( that took 6 hours! IE the rest of Sunday !). I had a really nice lunch with the girls --it's much easier now that they are more independent and eat fairly well. Eating out is now less of a hassle; in fact eating in is harder !
We got home and the girls did a bit of homework at home, then since Chris was still at golf I packed everyone up in the car and we headed for Gardens By the Bay. The annual membership is awesome. I paid entry for the 2 helpers and we visited Cloud Forest Dome.
After a quick dinner at home ( it was VERY tempting to just eat out again at the Gardens ! ) we popped over to a neighbour's home to play. A totally relaxing way to end the weekend and I was very sad for Monday to come again. ( Kind of, although it also means the kids are meaningfully occupied!)
On the 6th of April I took Liam for his cardiac appointment ( this was post - hospitalization when the paediatrician picked up a cardiac murmur ).
Liam did very well! He was a seasoned 'patient': no fuss when the cardiologist listened to his heart, and he also allowed a trainee cardiologist have a listen as well. When he had to have the echocardiogram he stayed still long enough for the radiographer to scan his heart. ( I had him on me and I lay on the examination couch ).
When the radiographer was done she called the doctor in to have a check and that really scared me! We all know they only ever call the doctors in to review the scans if something is wrong! Fortunately that wasn't the case and Liam was discharged with a normal echo.
So that leaves us with one more paediatrician review in June to repeat his blood count ( he's also mildly anaemic! )
We've been laying low the past few days: I really wanted everything to go back to normal. So, tennis/swim on Tuesday, Chinese class Wednesday , music class Thursday and swim class again on Friday.
On Sunday Madison had to go for round 2 of the JTT mini tennis tournament.
It was a scorching day! She did really well, no complaining throughout the 2+ hours of tennis ! Her tennis partner Ravin got the runners' up trophy: he was short of winning by 1 point!
The only bugbear of this tournament was seriously the 'hovering' dad syndrome that 2 fathers' had.
( by the way-- their sons won the trophies partly because they did that!) Parents were given specific instructions that the point of the tournament was for the kids to learn to play competitively and learn the spirit of the game. Parents were to stay off and let the kids pick their own balls and count points. However there were at least 2 dads who found it exceedingly difficult to do so and hovered around their sons, picked balls up and basically umpired the matches for them. I didn't realize it at the point, but as the game was counted purely on the number of points the child could score in the games, they obviously scored the most points because their dads were handing them balls to hit continuously!
After the game we drove to Marina Bay golf course to meet up with Annika and we had lunch together. Chris left for his golf game ( that took 6 hours! IE the rest of Sunday !). I had a really nice lunch with the girls --it's much easier now that they are more independent and eat fairly well. Eating out is now less of a hassle; in fact eating in is harder !
We got home and the girls did a bit of homework at home, then since Chris was still at golf I packed everyone up in the car and we headed for Gardens By the Bay. The annual membership is awesome. I paid entry for the 2 helpers and we visited Cloud Forest Dome.
After a quick dinner at home ( it was VERY tempting to just eat out again at the Gardens ! ) we popped over to a neighbour's home to play. A totally relaxing way to end the weekend and I was very sad for Monday to come again. ( Kind of, although it also means the kids are meaningfully occupied!)
Wednesday, April 1, 2015
Admission to KKH
What a shocker of a weekend.
After a blissful trip to Hong Kong ( which NEARLY didn't happen for him ), Liam came back and was promptly sick !
It was all rather sudden. One day he was fine and the next he had this raging fever that wouldn't go away despite all the antipyretics he was given.
Chris and I were supposed to have flown to Seoul on Friday night, but seeing that his fever was 41 degrees Celcius we took him to KKH emergency department to have some tests done.
It was really fortunate that Dr Arif was on duty and when he heard the history he advised admission. He told me that he'd seen a few cases of kids with viraemic 'shock' and that it was better that he was in hospital in case it happened.
Chris continued with his trip while I stayed back with Liam. It was so fortunate that it being Friday the older 2 could stay over with the grandparents!
Liam was thoroughly miserable and clingy on admission. By midnight the on call registrar came in and advised that he was put on an IV drip as he was likely dehydrated. By golly. That was stressful. The first guy that came in was obviously inexperienced and couldn't get it in over 2 tries. I asked for his registrar to come and do it. Fortunately she got it in, otherwise I'd have asked for a paediatric anaesthetist to come in.
The next few days were terrible. Liam was cranky, refusing to eat or drink anything and was really clingy. His temperatures were still high and only broke after day 5. He started having diarrhoea as well and it was such a hassle to change his diapers everytime as his IV plug was on his foot.
Chris did come back Monday at 3 am so I got to go home and have my first sleep then.
Thankfully Liam's fever finally broke on Monday afternoon, Monday night he had a low grade temperature and by Tuesday he was finally afebrile.
Of course to complicate matters he was found to have a cardiac murmur AND a low haemoglobin.
So now we have an appointment to see the cardiologist on Monday next week and a follow up appointment with the paediatrician in 3 months.
Liam was discharged Tuesday morning, and he's never been so happy to be home! The other kids were also nicer to him for a little while before the fighting started again.
All the lab tests came back negative and so he was diagnosed with the usual 'viral fever'. It was seriously a traumatic experience, but I have nothing but a really good experience with the ward nurses and the paediatrician. ( My only complaint would be the MOs on call in the ward that night -- really poor attitude and poor communication skills!)
After a blissful trip to Hong Kong ( which NEARLY didn't happen for him ), Liam came back and was promptly sick !
It was all rather sudden. One day he was fine and the next he had this raging fever that wouldn't go away despite all the antipyretics he was given.
Chris and I were supposed to have flown to Seoul on Friday night, but seeing that his fever was 41 degrees Celcius we took him to KKH emergency department to have some tests done.
It was really fortunate that Dr Arif was on duty and when he heard the history he advised admission. He told me that he'd seen a few cases of kids with viraemic 'shock' and that it was better that he was in hospital in case it happened.
Chris continued with his trip while I stayed back with Liam. It was so fortunate that it being Friday the older 2 could stay over with the grandparents!
Liam was thoroughly miserable and clingy on admission. By midnight the on call registrar came in and advised that he was put on an IV drip as he was likely dehydrated. By golly. That was stressful. The first guy that came in was obviously inexperienced and couldn't get it in over 2 tries. I asked for his registrar to come and do it. Fortunately she got it in, otherwise I'd have asked for a paediatric anaesthetist to come in.
The next few days were terrible. Liam was cranky, refusing to eat or drink anything and was really clingy. His temperatures were still high and only broke after day 5. He started having diarrhoea as well and it was such a hassle to change his diapers everytime as his IV plug was on his foot.
Chris did come back Monday at 3 am so I got to go home and have my first sleep then.
Thankfully Liam's fever finally broke on Monday afternoon, Monday night he had a low grade temperature and by Tuesday he was finally afebrile.
Of course to complicate matters he was found to have a cardiac murmur AND a low haemoglobin.
So now we have an appointment to see the cardiologist on Monday next week and a follow up appointment with the paediatrician in 3 months.
Liam was discharged Tuesday morning, and he's never been so happy to be home! The other kids were also nicer to him for a little while before the fighting started again.
All the lab tests came back negative and so he was diagnosed with the usual 'viral fever'. It was seriously a traumatic experience, but I have nothing but a really good experience with the ward nurses and the paediatrician. ( My only complaint would be the MOs on call in the ward that night -- really poor attitude and poor communication skills!)
Thursday, March 5, 2015
Bullying in school
When does having fun cross over to bullying?
I really dread that I now have to face this but I suppose it's something that was probably a matter of time.
For the past week or so Madison has been having these really weird night terrors.
She would go to sleep fine, then at 1130 pm or midnight she would suddenly start playing on the slide in her room by herself! It is really creepy.
When we go up and ask her what she was doing she would start crying inconsolably until I told her to stop it.
The next day she says she doesn't remember crying or doing any of those things.
I asked her if she was feeling sad and she said a little bit. She then told me that there are 3 girls in her class who wanted to use her markers despite her saying 'no'. They then started to ?pinch her on her arm. She told them to stop or she would tell the teacher. They continued to do it so she did tell the teacher and the girls were told off. Subsequently they didn't want to be her friend or something to that effect.
I talked to Madison and said what she did was right, and that she could also give them a warning the next time before going to the teacher.
For some reason the pinching occurred again today! I asked Madison if she wanted me to speak with her teacher and she did.
So I've called the school up and spoken to the counsellor. And I've dropped an email to her form teacher. I'm waiting to see what comes out of it but am wondering how far I should escalate this matter!
I just don't understand why some children can just be so mean and hurtful. Is it a parenting thing? Are these children spoilt? Do they need more attention? When does being playful cross over to bullying? I think if it starts to hurt the other party it can constitute bullying?
I really dread that I now have to face this but I suppose it's something that was probably a matter of time.
For the past week or so Madison has been having these really weird night terrors.
She would go to sleep fine, then at 1130 pm or midnight she would suddenly start playing on the slide in her room by herself! It is really creepy.
When we go up and ask her what she was doing she would start crying inconsolably until I told her to stop it.
The next day she says she doesn't remember crying or doing any of those things.
I asked her if she was feeling sad and she said a little bit. She then told me that there are 3 girls in her class who wanted to use her markers despite her saying 'no'. They then started to ?pinch her on her arm. She told them to stop or she would tell the teacher. They continued to do it so she did tell the teacher and the girls were told off. Subsequently they didn't want to be her friend or something to that effect.
I talked to Madison and said what she did was right, and that she could also give them a warning the next time before going to the teacher.
For some reason the pinching occurred again today! I asked Madison if she wanted me to speak with her teacher and she did.
So I've called the school up and spoken to the counsellor. And I've dropped an email to her form teacher. I'm waiting to see what comes out of it but am wondering how far I should escalate this matter!
I just don't understand why some children can just be so mean and hurtful. Is it a parenting thing? Are these children spoilt? Do they need more attention? When does being playful cross over to bullying? I think if it starts to hurt the other party it can constitute bullying?
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